My Curse
by Beautiful Cerberus
Summary: Vincent Valentine finds out he has a disease, and has to deal with his friend's reaction to it past and present. VincentxLucrecia, slight VincentxShelke. First chapter begins story as a songfic.
1. Evil Angel

**Disclaimer: I don't own Vincent Valentine, or Lucrecia, or Square Enix. I also don't own the song used in chapter one. Breaking Benjamin does.**

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Summary: This is a VincentxLucrecia, slight VincentxShelke fic. Vincent finds out that he has come down with a disease, and has to deal with his friend's reaction to it; the past, and present. First chapter introduces the story, and is also a songfic. 'Evil Angel' by Breaking Benjamin.**

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_**"Evil Angel"**_

_Hold it together, birds of a feather_

_Nothing but lies and crooked wings_

_I have the answer, spreading the cancer_

_You are the faith inside me_

Vincent Valentine proceeded to journey up to Lucrecia Crescent's cave, where he always visited. He was supposed to never come back here; he had sworn that she was out of his life when he defeated Omega a few months ago. However, since he had said goodbye, there was always a slight tension in his heart. It was as if a muscle had been strained. At first he thought it was something wrong with him physically, but it wasn't. It was different. After many a day of thought, he realized that it was his ache of separation, and his pain of distance. Lucrecia was the root of this pain.

_No, don't_

_Leave me to die here_

_Help me survive here_

_Alone, don't_

_remember, remember..._

Vincent walked to the core of Lucrecia's cave, awaiting the moment he got to gaze upon her face once again. He thought he had let go, but he hadn't. She was his guardian angel, but she was never there. Why was he going back to her? He was supposed to be done with her! He was giving in to his feelings, and becoming weaker. She was his addiction. She was someone he couldn't possibly let go of. Lucrecia Crescent was an evil angel. Vincent Valentine sat down in front of the mako crystal pillar containing his beloved. She was still there, frozen as she always was. Her skin cold, untouched behind glassy crystal.

_Put me to sleep, evil angel_

_Open your wings, evil angel_

"Lucrecia, it's hard to stay away. You have a strong hold on me, and that's why I'm here again...though I vowed to stay away," Vincent said. As far as he was concerned, this was a bad move. It was like he was repeatedly crawling back to his past, oblivious to what the consequences would be later. She was a magnetic force in his life, never losing the her gravitational luster. It was ripping a hole into Vincent very slowly, and he was slowly feeling the pain of it.

_I'm a believer, nothing could be worse_

_All these imaginary friends_

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Hiding betrayal, driving the nail_

_Hoping to find a savior_

_No, don't_

_leave me to die here, help me survive here_

_Alone, don't surrender_

_Surrender..._

As soon as those thoughts ran through his head, he felt it. The burning was unexplainable as the hole in his heart spread wider, ashen at the edges. The tissue turned black as the cancerous gloom spread like wildfire. It played like a movie in Vincent's head, and he clutched his chest as he thought of it. Like a cigarette burning through paper, the hole in his chest spread wide. It made all of his organs ache, and his blood felt tainted. Overall he felt dead. One wasn't supposed to feel this way. Vincent knew why it was now. It was her. Though a crystallized, beautiful women at first glance, the inside of her was what made him feel this way. The lure of her mind, the lure of her words, the lure of not knowing her true feelings was why Vincent was dying. It was true. She was a real cancer. An evil angel. _'My evil angel...'_

_Put me to sleep, evil angel_

_Open your wings, evil angel_

_Fly over me, evil angel_

_Why can't I breathe?_

_Evil angel _

Vincent looked away from the crystalline mass containing his beloved. He could feel his insides burning away. All his redemption was gone. The weight of Lucrecia's world was now upon him, but he wanted it gone forever. This was enough. He had enough. This could no longer continue. Thirty years of hell was enough.

"Vincent Valentine."

A voice. A young girl. Shelke Rui.

Vincent slowly turned, facing the youth in his sitting position. She stood at the entrance, a small figure at a distance. Her auburn hair sloped outward on the sides of her head. Vincent shuddered. Usually he never allowed anyone to come in here for any purpose, especially if he was there. It was his confinement, his sanctuary, and now it was his prison. Lucrecia literally had a hold on him by the wrists.

However, Shelke was different. She was...okay.

Vincent quickly stood up, feeling a weird feeling arise in his stomach. He wasn't feeling too well. Shelke moved not an inch from the entrance. Vincent turned his back on Lucrecia, knowing that he would only be kicked with a wave of nausea and hurt if he looked at her one more time. He slowly and unsteadily walked toward the entrance, passing by Shelke gently. "...I'm not feeling too well. I'm going back," he said over his shoulder. Shelke sighed. Up ahead in the distance, she saw the shape of Lucrecia's body inside the mako pillar. Lucrecia held a different meaning for her now. Things had changed...the changes were all but recognizable. She sighed and turned away from the cave, exiting what was left of the entrance.

_Put me to sleep, evil angel_

_Open your wings, evil angel_

_Fly over me, evil angel_

_Why can't I breathe?_

_Evil angel_


	2. Discovery

**Disclaimer: I once again do not own Vincent Valentine, or any of Square Enix's beautifulness.**

**Summary: The second chapter. **

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**Chapter Two:**

Vincent Valentine emerged from the Seventh Heaven after having a few drinks to calm, and perhaps sooth himself. He thought it'd probably be a while until it took effect. It was mid-afternoon, maybe around 1:00. The streets of Edge were getting a little clearer; emptier than they were earlier in the day. Vincent sighed. Now was the time.

He had made a doctor's appointment, and it had been set for around 1:30. Knowing this doctor's office was connected to Shinra made him somewhat uneasy, but he really needed to be monitored. He had been feeling unwell lately, like something was wrong. It started with a high fever, causing him to stay in bed for a whole day. Overall he was weak, and he knew that wouldn't work well with all of the fighting he does. What if there was a random attack on Edge, and things spiraled out of control? He had to be prepared; he was not.

He knew that it couldn't really be a fever lasting this long.

There was no way in hell it was his heartache.

It was silly. Lucrecia had no physical effect on him whatsoever...Except for the lust he felt on off-nights. There were days where he went crazy, longing for his physical desires to be replenished. His drive went wild, and he couldn't stand being alone. How hard it was for him, not being able to fulfill his physical fantasies with the one he loved. How tempting it was to see her, crystallized, sleeping, _waiting._ It was more than he could bear...Another reason to let go of her.

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Vincent stepped through the doors to the cool doctor's office, feeling the instant coolness on his warm face. It was refreshing and soothing. He looked around. Sterile, white. To the left, there was an open area with connected chairs on the north wall, separated from the office by a small archway. To the right, there was a circular white desk, with a woman sitting behind it. She wore white; Vincent didn't see her at first. There was a long, narrow hall before the north wall. He walked up to the counter. "Um...ma'am?" he said, afraid to go to close.

The woman looked up. Her eyes were tired, hidden under a bush of light brown hair. Her green eyes were inpenetrable. She reminded him of...

"I have an appointment today," he said. The woman said nothing. Just as Vincent was going to begin getting a little more stern, a doctor emerged from one of the doors in the hall. At first, Vincent could only see the tan skin from the corner of his eye, and couldn't read it out as a person. He looked toward the man. He looked as though he was in his forties, or around there, and he wore a long white coat. Thin glasses were perched on top of his long nose. He sickly reminded him of Hojo. It was all he could do to keep from showing the power of Cerberus and turning this white labyrinth into a sea of crimson. He etched the thought away.

"Mr. Valentine?" the doctor asked, beckoning him into the room. Vincent slowly retreated behind the doctor into the doorway to a small room. It glittered bright white with a desk on the north wall, covered in papers. There were a small table where Vincent guessed he would have to sit on in order to be examined. "Okay Mr. Valentine, I'm going to ask you to sit right up on that table there," said the doctor as he headed to his desk to retrieve some examination forms. Vincent grumbled inside. He didn't want anyone to tell him what to do; especially when he wasn't feeling well. But, he showed some obediance and sat on the table without even having to rise on his heels. He waited.

The doctor turned back around, letting Vincent have a look at his name tag. Dr. Jones. _Pretty common name, I guess, _Vincent thought. "Would you care to tell me the symptoms you are having?" the doctor asked, finally giving in and meeting his eyes.

"I, uh...I've had this...fever for a while. I've had to stay in bed for a few days...I'm sweating alot and I've been having chest pains..." Vincent replied, feeling shy about discussing physical matters even with a doctor. Doctor Jones raised his eyebrows and wrote some stuff on his clipboard.

The interrogations proceeded in a manner that made Vincent feel like he had constantly been repeating everything. From this, it seemed that his fever was rising, which came as a little suprise considering he was now in a place where that _wasn't _supposed to happen. He became relieved when Dr. Jones moved toward the X Ray machine and away from him. "Okay Mr. Valentine, I'm going to ask you to lay on the table while I take an X Ray of your entire torso area. Could you remove your cape for me?" he asked. Vincent knew he meant no perverted harm, but he couldn't help asking himself, _Is this guy an undercover porn star?_

Just to make things easier, and so he could get out faster, he took off his crimson cloak and set it on a row of chairs. He slowly laid down on the table, listening to the mechanical _whoosh _as Dr. Jones glided the X Ray machine over towards Vincent's side. Vincent closed his eyes, holding completely still, awaiting the moment he was able to be X Rayed. He heard footsteps, and then found that the room went completely dark. _Mandatory for an X Ray..._ he sleepily thought.

Vincent felt a light graze over him, but fidgeted not. Low sounds of buzzing came from the machine as it manevered itself over his body. His mind drifted to other things, knowing that it wouldn't last long. He thought about talking with Cloud at the bar, he thought about the latest book he was reading...

But then, a voice.

"Vincent...I'm sorry, I cannot help you," it said.

Vincent's eyes shot open. _Lucrecia._

Just then, the lights flickered back to life in the small office, blinding Vincent briefly. He struggled not to look startled in front of Doctor Jones. "All right, I'll be right back with your pictures," he said.

_So fast? Technology these days..._

Vincent sat up, watching as the doctor slipped out of the room.

For those singular moments Vincent fought as hard as he could to make the voice stay away. He couldn't afford to go crazy. He couldn't afford to cry. Not _here_. What would the doctors think? _Forget what they think..._

While Vincent was wallowing in his self-crisis, the doctor emerged from the outside of the door with Vincent's X Ray results. His face looked somber, worried, and clouded with light sorrow. Vincent wondered how he had gone from casual doctor, to a remorsing interpreter. He headed for the X Ray board on the west wall, and hung the pictures up before the light. Sure, Vincent didn't really care enough to compulsively study what X RAy pictures show, but from the sudden spiral of emotion in the room...from the look of Dr. Jone's face, he knew it couldn't be good. The doctor sighed, pointing to the pictures.

"I find it very unfortunate to tell you Mr. Valentine, but...you have lung cancer; a not very treatable kind," he said, pointing to a lump in what looked to be Vincent's rib cage.

A huge weight cracked Vincent's heart.

_Cancer...?_

"From the looks of it, it originated around the time you started to feel symptoms and fevers...Do you smoke, Mr. Valentine?" the doctor asked.

A few moments passed before Vincent shook his head.

"Do any of your friends smoke?" he asked.

_Friends? _Come to think of it, he didn't really have...

Cid.

As soon as that realization stumbled through his head, he nodded. Cid and him usually do spend time together at the bar, and Cid usually _is _smoking. He did all the time. Now Vincent was disgusted at the thought of how many times he had breathed in Cid's secondhand smoke, unaware it was choking the life out of him.

But..._that _was enough? Secondhand smoke, giving him cancer? No wonder he felt dead inside...

"I'm very sorry, Mr. Valentine," the doctor said.

Vincent's head stayed down, his dark hair shrouding his face. How he felt betrayed, how he felt useless, how he felt unclean. But..why? It seemed as though his whole body had already shut down, despite the cancer slowly growing inside of him.

He lifted his head slowly. "...How long do I have?" he asked, his voice untouched by the looming death in the room.

The doctor sighed. "As a doctor, I don't want to burden you with that..." he said. Vincent said no more.

He sat on the table, staring down at the floor as the distant voice of Dr. Jones' explained where he could go to get treatment. He knew it wouldn't help. It'd be useless; as he was.

Vincent said no more.


End file.
